the after life.

Sometimes when I get really excited about something, or bummed about something I missed out on that would've been awesome, I think about how kick ass heaven is going to be.

For example, today I was thinking about eating at the Legion Club after church, and how I won't ever get to do that again. Then I decided heaven will have a giant coat room to play in, full of the big, soft, tan and navy coats of American veterans and their wives. Heaven will also have tiny boxed cereals. And mini quiche. And bacon.

I also decided that heaven will be like a Beastie Boys concert where the beer costs a quarter. I know what you must be thinking. "If it's heaven, why isn't the beer free and why doesn't it just materialize in your hand when you want one?" Because. Think of all the cool people you'll meet in line!

Heaven will also have a trampoline room, a zip line into a swimming pool, and spontaneous real time, real life freeze frames.